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Friday Faves: I need some sleep

Good morning Loves.  Last weekend I was in Boston and this weekend I will be at home recovering from my week.  I don’t want to sound like I’m preaching to the choir, but I realized I’m not 22 anymore.  I used to be go, go, go and now that I’m in my 30s I need a few good ways to recover from my exciting times.  Don’t get me wrong, I still like to have fun.  I just need to give my body some TLC afterwards.  Is that sad?

The truth is I just don’t have the stamina I did ten years ago.  I guess that’s OK because we all get older, but this year it’s hitting me hard.  I actually really love being 33 because I have grown up a lot in the last four years (since my 20s) both emotionally and financially, but the need to nap all the time is a bit brutal.  Do you ever feel old?

Enjoy these posts from our lovely personal finance friends:

KNS Financial – 7 Ways to Become a Saver – Even if You’ve Never Been One Before

Save Up – Don’t be afraid of debt: Blogger interview with Narrow Bridge Finance

Club Thrifty – Women’s Power Wednesday

Eyes on the Dollar - Would You Sell Your House If IT Meant Debt Freedom?

Impersonal Finance – Travel is historically cheap, but you can still save on it

Photo by dannybrazil

Why get married?

Good morning Loves.  One of my friends just announced that she’s engaged.  As her friend I am very happy for her, but as a financial planner I have to question the motives as to why she wants to get married.  My friend is a great catch; she’s pretty, polite, educated and well mannered.

She’s my friend and we’ve been friends for years.  She has a lot of great qualities, but the truth is she’s not so great with money.  She is one of those people who works full time but never seems to have cash.  So when she started dating a successful investment banker who asked for her hand in marriage she was quick to say “I Do”.

Was it for love?

In an ideal world I would like to think everyone gets married because they are head over heels in love.  But I know that would be a bit naive.

As children we are taught to grow up, fall in love and get married.  If you grow up and find yourself unmarried in your 30s maybe we end up settling to find our happily ever after.  When I was in my 20s one of my co-workers told me that the key to a happy marriage is compromise.  I am wondering if that is true.  Sometimes it seems to be.  We compromise some things in our relationships such as true love to gain other valuable traits such as financial stability.

Being single can be hard on the wallet.  In your early 20s it’s OK to be single because you can live with roommates and travel with friends.  But as you get older all your friends get married so you end up living and travelling alone and that can be very expensive.

Maybe it was for money.

So what’s the alternative to living and travelling alone while incurring the costs ourselves?  The alternative is to get married to someone who is not perfect but who is good enough.  I am not saying my friend went out to find the richest man she could to propose to her and I’m not saying that my friend is a gold digger.  All I’m saying is two years ago my friend couldn’t even afford to get her nails done at the same time and now she goes to the salon once every two weeks.

I have had conversations with my friend when she ended up in tears because she couldn’t afford to pay all her bills in the same month.  Now she is living debt free, has a house and is planning a honeymoon in Tahiti.  All and all I would say her life has greatly improved since she started dating her now fiancé.

If you’re luck it’s because you found your perfect match.

Why would anyone get married if they didn’t find their perfect match?  Maybe it’s for money or maybe money is just an added bonus.  I don’t believe there is such a thing as a perfect relationship, just like there’s no such thing as a perfect family.  However I do believe there is perfect for me.

The qualities I look for in a relationship may not be the same as the qualities my friend looks for in her relationship and vice versa.   At the end of the day if you get married and you are happy, regardless of any alternative motives, I guess that’s all that matters.

Photo by momo

Why I Will Never Buy A Home

Good morning Loves.  I have a personal confession to make, I am 33 years old and I rent an apartment.  I know what most of you personal finance chicas and chicos are thinking – But Why?  Trust me I get that all the time.  The truth is I have been renting an apartment since I was 18 years old and I don’t think I will ever buy a home.

I am a lifelong renter

I tried to buy a home twice and both times I backed out of the deal.  The first time I made an offer on a newly renovated condominium and when someone out bid me I didn’t submit a counter offer.  The second time I tried to buy a home I actually gave the developer a check to reserve my unit.  I went home, had a panic attack and two days later I went back to the developer to get my check.  The offer and reservation were contingent upon being approved for financing so I told the contractor that the bank did not approve me for a mortgage.  And that was that.

The thought of a big commitment such as buying a home is absolutely terrifying for me.  I try to picture myself sitting down at the notary’s office and signing on the dotted line but honestly I just don’t see it.  The thought of making such a huge financial committment really freaks me out.  The thought of signing a document that attaches me to living in the same place also scares me.

I have lived in my apartment for almost six years and before this I lived in my previous apartment for four years.  I am not a big fan of change, but I would at least like the option.  If I buy a home I feel like I would be stuck.

Buying a home is not my thing

I live with my boyfriend in our apartment and just the thought of buying a big home gives me a headache.  I don’t want to shovel snow, take out the garbage and cut the grass.  When I think of having a big house I think of all the time and commitment it’s going to take to keep it clean.  A bigger house means more work and I just don’t have the time to spare.

In my childhood home my sister and I had to help out with weekly chores, that means there were four people cleaning the house.  The experience will be much different when there are only two of us.   I have a hard enough time trying to clean my apartment on Sunday’s let alone try to clean a big house with indoor and outdoor maintenance.  My boyfriend would like me to clean the apartment twice a week, but in our 15 years together that has yet to happen.

Maybe I’m a chicken, maybe I’m afraid of commitment, who knows?  All I can say is I like the carefree, commitment free lifestyle that comes with renting an apartment.  That’s why I will never buy a home.

Photo by owenbrown

Friday Faves: Boston, Glamorous and Careers

Happy Friday Loves.  As you read this I’m off to Boston for the weekend.  If you need a little break from life I suggest a road trip with friends.  Last year we took the same trip with four girls.  This year we decided to make a cut because the dynamic of four girls in a car for five hours and a hotel room for two days is just a little too much.

Although the cost will be a little more expensive the peace of mind is worth it.  We have a whole bunch of fun things planned this weekend such as a visit to The New England Aquarium and dinner at Wahlburger’s.

Have a great weekend and enjoy these posts from our lovely friends:

Modern Retro Woman – You Are Not Born Glamorous.  Beauty is Created.

My Bank Tracker – How Much Do You Know About 401(k) Fees?

Budget Bloggess – The Side Effects of a Fashion Cleanse

My Alternate Life - What Can An Average Income Buy?

Savvy Financial Latina - What is Your Next Career Move?

Photo by CarlaGates