I’m currently away getting hitched and honeymooning on a secluded beach somewhere. In the meantime, I hope you enjoy these guests posts that I have lined up for you! I’ll be back online and back to reality on Wednesday, June 22, 2011. — Amber
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This is guest post from Clare at Never Niche … one of my favorite gals in the blogosphere. 
Hello, everyone! My name is Clare and I blog at Never Niche. While I write mostly about personal finance and other goal-oriented tasks by the month, I don’t have the attention span to maintain a “niche” in this big ol’ blogosphere, hence my blog’s name. If you love personal finance, exercise, and unexpected spurts of total random-ness and don’t want to see a photo of my oatmeal with chia seeds every morning, come on over.
I’ve been reading Amber’s awesomeness since her anonymous days as Carrie on the Cheap. Now we entertain one another on a weekly basis via Twitter and constant Rebecca Black lyrics. While she’s off getting sand under her manicured, bridal toenails and drankin’ white wine on her honeymoon, you and I are probably at work right now. Cruel, right? You’re stuck with me for a guest post!
I joked about calling this post “Redheaded and Reasonable” as a riff on Amber’s blog title but I decided to keep the ginger references to a dull roar instead. You’re welcome.
Today I want to talk about what it means to afford things.” The cookies in my browser definitely know who I am as a reader. Ad sidebars in various blogs and on Facebook continually target my interest in personal finance with catchy links such as, “What should your net worth be?” and “Retire by 40!” It’s enough to drive a young woman mad.
As I near my thirties, it’s become second nature to compare my financial situation to the people that surround me. Something occurred to me recently: my peers and I use the same language of the words, “I can’t afford it,” to mean two very different things.
My version of “I can’t afford it.”
When I announce that I can’t afford something, be it a vacation, dress, or other un-planned for expense, I don’t mean I literally can’t afford it (unless I’m being offered a Ferrari or a house, but let’s be realistic here). Sure, I have the money for aforementioned expense. That money, however, is always earmarked for other purposes: emergency fund, extra school loan payment, new-to-me vehicle, and plane tickets twice a year to see family, for example. This wasn’t true for me a year ago when my finances were an unfortunate mess and besides my 401K, I had no savings. A year ago marks my financial tipping point I and switched gears using a mix of sheer will, determination, and the inspiration of blogs like Amber’s. Though it’s been a gigantic learning process with plenty of failures, I can say that I now budget for everything. When friends ask me I can afford something now, I tell them: “Sure. By when?” If I can plan for, I can pay for it. I believe this wholeheartedly.
The other version of “I can’t afford it.”
You literally can’t afford it. You didn’t budget it for it nor do you don’t have any savings that you could substitute to pay for it. You live paycheck to paycheck, eat at restaurants constantly, and try to keep up with your personal Joneses– usually your friends, significant other, and co-workers. This was me a year ago!
Lately my ears tingle any time I hear these words and my brain immediately begins analyzing whether it’s meant figuratively or literally. I think we all have the friend that means it literally but still somehow expects you to admire her shiny new $400 shoes.
Thanks for reading. Now for something more lighthearted, like…let’s go to Hawaii. Can you afford it?
Congratulations to Amber and her new husband! I wish you a lifetime of happiness together. All you need is love.
hi!! I just checked out your blog! How is the P90 X going? I’m so curious, I’m thinking of doing. People love it……..
thx!
P90X is DIFFICULT! I recommend it so far but I’m also very much an out-of-shape beginner.
I love reading Never Niche – Clare is a great choice for a guest blogger.
I always think it’s interesting when people say they are “broke” because it can have so many different meanings, from having no money to last until their next paycheck, to they are saving 15% of their income in their retirement account, and another 10% for other goals like a Caribbean vacation, and they do not want to divert that money towards eating out at a restaurant or whatever has come up. I’ve realized that everyone’s financial situation and goals are different, so we just need to focus on our own path and try not to judge others’ choices (though sometimes that can be so hard!).
Congrats, Clare, on perservering towards your goals! You can do it!
Thank you, Marie! I appreciate it.
I have to say, even now when being able to budget and such, that there is one more. LITERALLY cannot afford it. not because you can’t save, or because you spend it on other things, but because you can’t even pay for your basic needs and medical expenses. I’ve been there. I’ve done that. And though I don’t want a pity party, things like even eating out were completely out of the question, sometimes eating in was even an iffy thing. Times are tough and jobs don’t always pay well or give you enough options for hours. Daycare is EXPENSIVE and medical bills are even more so. Though this is the vast minority of people who “can’t afford it” I still believe that it’s one with mentioning
<3 you.
You’re so right, Sadie! Forgive me for neglecting that one.
Yes, exactly. I always try to be happy for people about healthy financial planning, but when you’re in the situation where you literally can’t afford food, it’s tough when “financial planning” isn’t even an option for you yet.
Good post. I say I can’t afford it quite a bit and a lot of times it is not literally, it’s just that it’s not in the budget. If you have the right credit card or spend every dime you have there are a lot of things you can so called afford but the question is should you? The answer unfortunately is usually no. Bummer. I have money sitting in the bank and say not to trips and other outings because that isn’t what the money is for and that’s just the way it has to be until I win the lotto!
I know how you feel, absolutely!
Clare I absolutely love this post! Although you live frugally, you plan carefully for events so that you can enjoy them when they happen. Why, I remember that when your unemployed friend from California came for a visit last fall you wined & dined her like she was a rockstar. I am willing to bet you had planned in advance for that. And I think THAT is what is the hardest thing about financial planning: the patience. We live in an instant gratification world. Truly affording something usually takes diligence and a lot of effort. It’s super unglamorous! I am working hard to be in the first category, though because what I want to do in the next few years is really going to force me to get my financial act together. You set a very good example for me with your finances & I really listen to the advice you give on this subject I have to say.