Gretchen Rubin says it best in her book The Happiness Project: “Outer order brings inner calm.”
One of my goals for 2011 was to find a routine. Not like a dance routine (I already found one of those), but like a daily, ordered routine. Basically following a schedule instead of rushing around like a crazy person. I thrive on a structured, ordered life and my husband and I both felt like our lives were a bit out of order (or … out of balance?) during the wedding planning. Since we returned from our honeymoon, it’s funny how easy its been for us to create a routine and maintain outer order.
When you have a major life event on the horizon and you don’t have much time for yourself, life starts to get a little crazy. These are typically the types of things that happen (taken from personal experience):
- wanting to use all your down time to relax because you have so little of it
- not getting chores like grocery shopping done because you want to spend free time relaxing
- rushing … constantly
- waking up late
- not having enough time for people … especially those you want to make time for
- not cooking at home because we were always out of groceries (see bullet #2)
But everyone is busy. I know that. Everyone is busy in their own way and it’s relative to each individual situation.
Still, my husband and I both vowed that we would get our lives in order and get back to a routine once the wedding was over.
And we have.
And we’re much happier.
Here’s how our routine and life order has improved recently:
- Getting up earlier. For some reason, I struggled to get out of bed when I always stressed from the wedding. Now, I’ve been popping out of bed in the mornings. It’s a great feeling.
- Going for morning workouts. It’s nice to get up early enough to actually get your workout in before work so your entire evening is free. Remember how I said I wanted to be a morning exerciser? I’m starting to get there.
- Getting off at a reasonable time. Both of our offices have flexible schedules (which I’ve mentioned can be more of a curse than a blessing) and when you sleep late, you get in late, and you get off late. With this routine, sleep and work eat up most of your day.
- Cooking. This is a new routine for us. When I get home from work, I’ll start cooking. (Even though I don’t really love to cook, I’m still pretty good at it.) It’s nice to have a home-cooked healthy meal almost every week night.
- Cleaning. This is the best part of our new routine: When I cook, G does ALL the cleaning! It makes me a happy little wife. So, I come home, cook, feast and then relax.
- Free Time. And then there are 2 or 3 precious hours after dinner that are spent however we like. It’s glorious. We’ll usually read. Or watch Family Guy. Or G will try to turn on Intervention on A&E and I’ll tell him that show makes me sad so we can’t watch it and a remote control war will ensue. That also happens when he turns it to sports. Sometimes we’ll take a walk. Sometimes we’ll have a happy hour with friends. Sometimes I’ll work on blog stuff or tweet or Facebook. The best part is that we have free time now because we’ve settled into a routine and we’re not rushing around constantly. Gosh, I love that the wedding is over.
Back in college, I probably would have thought this routine was mega-boring. But, today I love it. Our routine has brought G and I much happiness. Gretchen Rubin is right. Outer order really does bring inner calm.
I think this means that I can scratch one more goal off my list for 2011. Find a routine. CHECK.
I’m planning to get together a blog post that includes tips for getting into a good routine. What are your best tips for getting into a daily routine?
About B&B
We have… no good routine like you describe here. It’s all haphazard, and everytime I try to implement a routine, we immediately deviate. Is G as organized as you?
I hear you on the flexible schedule. Ideally, I should be leaving in < 7 minutes, but i'm still in the coffee + blogs morning routine (which, btw, is not a highly productive routine, but I do quite enjoy it!) I know a lot of people have a little downtime at work to read blogs, but I rarely do.
Have you seen the “I love blogs and coffee” print by Made By Girl? Your comment reminded me of that.
If anything, G is more organized than me and that motivates me to be more organized. So that definitely helps.
I’m lucky enough to have a few moments of free time at work to red blogs-especially over my lunch or during the mid-month lag.
Glad you’ve been able to settle down and relax some! I also like to have a routine but to stick to it, I need to get to bed by 8:30 so that I’m falling asleep by 9. Needless to say, that doesn’t always happen and then the rest of my routine is thrown off – I push my workout to the evening instead of the morning, rush around in the morning, and don’t have time to get the stuff done in the evening I need to. To get back on track, the first thing that needs to change is my bedtime. Once I go to bed early one night, I can get up early the next day and I’m back on track.
Totally agree! I think that will be my #1 tip for creating a routine-get into a good bedtime habit. Because if I get to bed late my whole routine is off the next day-like you.
Getting up early is key. I joined a bootcamp that meets every morning at 6am and I love it. It forces me to get up early and gives me time to organize my life before I have to be at work. I am able to walk my dog, water my veggie garden and make my lunch for the day. I know once bootcmap is over it will be hard to keep waking up at 6am but if the energy buzz keeps going…who knows maybe it’s my new wake time.
In some ways my new job gives me better balance…but not others! Spending more time on social media under the company name, for example, means I have less time and inclination to check in on my own accounts/read blogs during the day. Quiet weeknight evenings like yours are totally what I love and strive for. I don’t think getting up early will ever work for me; I’m a night owl and would rather stay up to do things than the other way around.
I’ve always been a pretty “routine” person, but nothing has motivated me to get it together more than having kids! Having a reliable and predictable routine gives my kids a sense of stability, and I really think they’re more well-behaved because of that. Plus, it helps me to be a better mom- bedtime for them at 8pm means RELAX time for me afterward. Having a set routine definitely helps me to fit in all my goals for the day, from chores and errands to hobbies (cooking, blogging) and cooking to studying and watching my favorite shows. I find that writing a to-do list for the day helps me stick to my plan. Nothing is as satisfying as scratching things off the list!
I also recently starting waking up an hour earlier, which took a little getting used to but has definitely benefited my productivity (and given me more free time for the fun stuff!)
Routines are the best! It creates balance in life.
I would have to say my best tips on setting up a routine, is writing it down. For a few days it might feel a little weird and new, but after about 3 or 4 days you will begin to look forward to your routine. I think writing things down places a physical energy into things and makes it much easier to follow through with your goals.
I love routines. I don’t have one down quite yet in our new place, but I have more time both before and after work, and I’ve been experimenting with fitting in everything I want to do.
You’ve inspired me to take a look at the goals I’ve set out in January 2011, and to reorganise my life again. I have to agree that outer order certainly brings inner calm. Just sitting down and making plans and routines all over again to get my life back in order is calming enough! Thank you!
I think people are as busy as they want to be, but I’m sure it’s much harder to control that when you don’t have kids, which I don’t.
What helps me is automating as much of my life as possible. I got a checking account primarily to get direct deposit and for paying bills, so that it’s not tied to my savings. I try to do as many things online as I can, such as banking and buying things online when I need or want to. If it can’t be done online then I do it in person. I used to run all over town trying to get everything done. I was stressed out and frustrated. Now that I try to more online, I have more free time.
It also helps if you donate away your things from time to time so you don’t end up with a house full of things. At a certain point we all reach “enough-ness” with material things, so by owning “just enough” – it cuts down on cleaning and maintenance. I read that people use 20% of what they buy. Cutting out the useless stuff, can help free up your time, money and energy.
This post stood out for me as I strive to be routine-oriented in my personal,professional, and social life. Reading about the way you were able to identify the components of your routine and put them into practice was exciting as it inspired me to keep on keepin’ on with my own routine. Many of the things you have implemented into your routine are things I am also trying to do! CMON MORNING EXERCISER! Thank you for being so open about your experiences that you share on your blog – believe me when I tell you that you are making a positive impact in the lives of your readers! CHEERS!